And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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