is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
