I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
love makes seman taste better
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Randomize
