It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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