But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Randomize
