I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
