Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Randomize
