okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
