I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
