Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
