If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
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