Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I pour the whiskey from now on
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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