Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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