Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
