im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
they're like a gay fantastic four
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
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