If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
are you so shy because you have an std?
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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