I forgot how hot balto sounded
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
