somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Randomize
