she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
As shirtless as possible
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize