He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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