You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Randomize
