just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
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