4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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