Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
