I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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