I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
