i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Randomize
