this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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