I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
