why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
