woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
