You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
