Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize