You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
