im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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