YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Girls should come with a carfax report
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize