??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
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