we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
