i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
