Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
