It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
