why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
is it fun? or sober?
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
