these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
