on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Randomize
