forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
