if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
