took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
