True but thats because hes a fetus.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
