i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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