Where is the hickey?
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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