me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
The feeling are messing with the penis
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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