im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
how drunk are you?
Several
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
