you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Randomize
